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What’s Your Occupation?

Smörgåsbord

There’s a little voice inside us all. Even those of us who aren’t blogging. Sometimes that voice is our biggest critic. Other times, it makes much more sense than what the world is telling us.

One such moment when my little voice was ‘right for a change’ happened as I was checking in to the labor and delivery ward at the hospital last March.

“And what’s your occupation?”

I hesitated before answering, just long enough for the admissions clerk to offer her own assertion.

“Homemaker?”

“Yes,” I smiled meekly. I watched her fill out the rest of the hospital paperwork and enter data in to the computer.

Why does that question bother us stay-at-home moms so much?

I started to imagine the things I ‘could have said’.

‘Domestic Engineer’ would have been more impressive. I am, after all, engineering a better life for my family through sacrificial, unpaid service 24/7.

‘Teacher’ – yeah, that’s a good one. We homeschool moms are teachers even if there’s no paycheck to show for it.

Then my little voice started getting really creative… ‘Blogger’. That would be a first. I’d get empty stares for sure. ‘Photographer’? ‘Writer’? The ‘not getting paid’ part would make me feel like I was lying (as if it really matters what a hospital clerk or the insurance company thinks).

It might not matter to my HMO provider, but “What’s Your Occupation?” is one of the most important questions you can ask someone. Once asked, my little voice wanted the correct answer – even if it never got put on that form; even though the answer was only for my benefit.

According to Dictionary.com…

oc·cu·pa·tion [ok-yuh-pey-shuhn] –noun

1. a person’s usual or principal work or business, esp. as a means of earning a living; vocation: Her occupation was dentistry.
2. any activity in which a person is engaged.
3. possession, settlement, or use of land or property.
4. the act of occupying.

Even more interesting…

Synonyms:
1. employment, pursuit, craft, métier. Occupation, business, profession, trade refer to the activity to which one regularly devotes oneself, esp. one’s regular work, or means of getting a living. Occupation is the general word: a pleasant or congenial occupation. Business esp. suggests a commercial or mercantile occupation: the printing business. Profession implies an occupation requiring special knowledge and training in some field of science or learning: the profession of teaching. Trade suggests an occupation involving manual training and skill: one of the building trades. 3. occupancy.

Usual, principal work. Engaged in Activity. Pursuit. Regular devotion.

What am I principally engaged in? What is my pursuit? What am I devoted to?

Isn’t it a sad world where the most important jobs are those that are the least recognized as valid? How many times have you heard someone say (in disgust) that women are wasting their talent to stay home and raise children? Giving up a career to educate their kids at home?

I mulled over the words that really should be on that form as my occupation:

Christian.
Wife.
Mother.
Daughter.
Friend.

… and yes – even the ones that I hesitated to take credit for because I don’t get paid for them…

Teacher.
Writer.
Blogger.
Photographer.
Artist.

I stood there in my house robe at six o’clock in the morning before my induction, my belly swollen with an amazing new child that I would meet that day for the first time, smiling to myself. I wouldn’t trade my life. Not for the most important thing – whatever that might be – that someone could say to fill up that blank on the form.

She handed me my arm band and told me where to take the elevator to the labor and delivery ward.

Who wouldn’t want to ‘make a home’? “Home is where the heart is,” I told myself.

Home is where you grow and bloom. It’s where everyone knows you – the real you – and they love you any way. It’s where your people are – all the ones that you can’t get through a day without hugging and kissing. It’s where you learn who you really are and what’s really important.

What a great thing to be a keeper, a gaurdian, a maker of such a precious place; a place called home.

Suddenly, I wanted her to make me a badge. I wanted her to write my ‘occupation’ right there under my religion and my blood type on that ‘just in case’ arm bracelet.

I AM occupied with ‘home’. No excuses. No need for hesitation. Go ahead and quote me ‘on the record’: I’m a homemaker.


P.S. ** updated Monday, January 11th at noon…

This post WAS my entry in to the free ticket to blissdom contest at Skimbaco Lifestyle. They asked us to write about how we live life to the fullest. Give or take an original twist.

I misunderstood the rules of the contest and thought that it was supposed to be posted here at my own blog – but it was supposed to be posted at Skimbaco!

They say the person with the most comments AT Skimbaco’s site wins… but I am the real winner – I’m a winner not because I got the $300 ticket to Blissdom, but because I have so many great family and friends! Rather than spam you all again asking for you to come comment at Skimbaco, I’m just going to withdraw my entry (that really wasn’t ever entered since it wasn’t done right). However, I don’t withdraw the message behind the post. Vive la homemaker!

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  5. Beautiful words, Heather. Of course, putting definitions in always gets my attention. 😉

    Occupied at home. Yes, for this time, for these amazing people who gather my love every day. a

    (Best wishes for you a free ticket!)

  6. What a beautiful post. From one homemaker to another, you're awesome!!
    Thanks for the reminder of how blessed we are to call ourselves makers of Home. 🙂

  17. Heather-
    You are a big goof ball =D And that is one of the many reasons I love you! You go girl!

    <3

    Christi (in icy cold Missouri)

  20. Isn't life fabulous! My "occupation", the job I do and receive money for is Asst. Reference Librarian…my true occupation is: Daughter of God, Spouse, Parent, Friend, Sister, Laugher, Tear Wiper, Comforter, Cuddler…

    Obviously I could go on and on and I think we share an occupation!

    If you go to Blissdom you have to wear a Tshirt with my photo on it. LOL Then I can be there in spirit and in cloth.

  21. Well, of course I want you to win after I read that! In fact, I am going to add you to my Blog reads so I can easily refer back to your homeschool stuff. Since this was the first time, I had been to your blog (not sure how I missed you since I started out using blogger), I checked out your profile. Happy to say, I like all the same things so you get an A+ in relate-ability! Look forward to visiting again.

  22. Thanks for sharing your great post. I love being a wife and stay at home mom. It is the best. God Bless. I hope you win.
    Amy

  23. I hope you win, I hope you win, I hope you win!! I'm so glad you did this! I know how much you want to go. Love the post. Very inspiring. Might be reading it again on those days I want to send my kids to boarding school. (God has a reason for me doing what I'm doing – it's growing me each day as much as it is them.) #thisiknow

  27. Heather — You are on my top 10 bloggy people to meet before I die 🙂

    You always offer much inspiration!!

    God bless,
    Sallie

  28. Amen! We are in the 34th year of our marriage, and I do not regret 1 single day of the 25 years that I have been privileged to be occupied at home. I do regret many of the days (especially after children) that I wasted in the years before when earning an income outside the home seemed so important.

    XOX

  29. I have been following your blog for a while now. I love this post! I couldn't agree with you more. Regardless of the pay scale, there is no better (or more important!) job.

    Good luck in the contest!
    Tricia

  32. I think we all struggle with this at one time or another. 🙂

    Great post, Heather! Good luck ~ I hope you get to go to Blissdom!

  34. LOVE this post! i noticed the other day while filling out a ton of stuff online that homemaker is under occupation on the drop down menu 😉

  37. What an awesome blog. As far as I am concerned, being a homemaker is the most important 'occupation' on this earth. And by the way, I would say you are also a writer, and a very good one at that! Love ya.

    Stacy

  42. Heather, being a MOM is an occupation, one that folks used to recognize and honor. Yes, sometimes things were better back then when people realized how much work being a MOM really is.

  47. It's one of the highest callings. 🙂

    -Eric

    P.S. You should have given away something. Giveaways get zillions of comments.

  53. Homemaker IS an important job!!! This is great – and vindicating for those of us who feel just like you do – but shouldn't!! My Brother and SIL both work and think I have 3 heads because we homeschool…oh well, we're loving it! 🙂

  55. Great post!
    I used to get the weirdest comments growing up when I would answer the question: "What do you want to be when you grow up?" with: "A housewife with lots of kids!"
    I'm doing my dream-job.
    I hope you win!

  58. That's a wonderful reminder to us all for not being ashamed of the job God has charged us with. I think most moms choose to work because it is easier for them than staying home and being a wife, mother, teacher, counselor, etc…

  61. Nice post and relection on a "rare" breed of women. Though our occupation may be looked down upon by society, God sees it as an honor and an important task in Proverbs 31! Thank you God that all of us are blessed beyond blessed, and able to stay home and educate our chidlren.

  62. Here's hoping you win. 🙂 "Homemaker" isn't the most glamourous of titles, but it's the title that God has bestowed upon us for now and that definitely means something. 🙂 Keep wearing it with pride, sister. 🙂

  67. I like to write "homemaker" as TWO words. "Home Maker." I don't know why that makes a big difference to me, but it does. I think just the slightest change of one little character space takes the title from an adjective to an aggressive verb. It takes away the "staying at home doing nothing" connotation that people thrust on us and makes it an intentional action.
    "I am a Home Maker. Making my house a home 24/7."

    Do you think I spend too much time thinking about trivial character spaces? 😛

  68. I was reading Jan Karon's book recently about the marriage of Timothy and Cynthia. and it makes an interesting point. One of the questions the Bishop asks the Father is if he is going to be okay with his wife making more money than him (Father is a priest, she's a famous children's author/artist!)

    And the point it makes is that we need to think of it not as "my money" and "His money" but rather, "our money" — whether you earn any of it yourself. That is part of the whole marriage thing and two being one flesh. it isn't just that you act like it is "our money" but you have to accept, fully, that it IS "our money" no matter what your individual role is in bringing it into the household.

  71. Nothing is more empowering as a woman, mother, child of God than enriching, educating, and loving our own children. We are what makes up today's society and together we water and watch our children bloom into productive creations/contributors to the future. I am honored to call my self a mother.

    Regards–Organized Chaos
    One busy mom of 4 and wife, who is humbled daily.

  72. Just for fun, consider writing your homemaker resume. I found it empowering to see how much I've accomplished in the past 14 years. But, then I posted it as a SAHM Blogger Resume, because I'm proud to be both!

  74. I love you mommy and even though you are not "in the contest" anymore, you still have a wonderful post to look back on. I am so proud of you and I hope that we all get to go anyway! 🙂
    Morganie

  75. Thank you, thank you, thank you for this post. You don't know it, but your post blessed me.
    I am a Christian, wife mother… and "accomplished career woman." I have a really good job with a local school district. I provide a valuable service to children with disabilities. I have a master's degree in my field. I hold two board certifications in two separate fields.
    And in the last 3 weeks, I have come to realize that this life I've always been told I want… is not the life I want.
    As my husband & I have begun to make a plan to get me in our home, educating our children, I have wrestled with the issue you blogged about. I'm going to be giving up that thing the world tells me I must have. And mostly I'm okay with it. Mostly.
    Thank you for the encouragement that I know you didn't realize your words would give.

  76. That was awesome! I loved it. I always feel sort of weird when I have to fill that out…sure I do a lot of little freelance things at my hubby's encouragement/insistence…but primarily I'm a wife and mother first and foremost…sometimes though I am not even sure if the word "homemaker" quite covers it, ya know? It's so much more…training up the future generation…

  77. Wow… What a Homemaker….
    What a Writer……,.
    What a Subject……..
    What a Woman………..

    And you "Steal French Fries"?

    Papa John

  79. Oh Well; but, as you said (and you're right because I agree with you), YOU'RE A WINNER!!

    I appreciate you and your family more than you probably realize.

    Take care,
    Mark

  80. Awesome blog! I have no children yet but I plan on homeschooling and being a full-time mom! This is one of the greatest callings on our lives as women to train up our children in the way they should go and God will bless you for it!