I haven’t been homeschooling since the 1980’s, back when people were hiding their children and creating their own curriculum, but it has been well over a decade for us – a way of life now ingrained. I have seen the shift from Yahoo email lists that were brimming with daily messages – stories, discussions, debates, aha moments – to quiet online lists that only send out welcome notes and the occasional field trip opportunity. It seems the conferences are brimming with ten times the curriculum and the virtual schools are popping up to replace the play-date gatherings.
There’s a lot less talk about child rearing and parenting skills. Less of the moms on my online lists are talking about how to actually get math done without tears or what works for them in getting their kids to do chores. I miss the advice and the accountability of having that online teacher’s lounge at my finger-tips.
We are all so much busier than we were, it seems. I know that is a huge factor for me. I wasn’t ever a real gung-ho co-op kind of teacher in the past, but with a one and three year old in my house, and high schoolers needing social activity that I can’t seem to provide while preserving nap time or my own sanity, I’m now sending my kids once a week to do classes at a home school co-op “school”. There’s less on my plate since the lesson plans don’t belong to me, but at least they do 90% of their work at the house or in the car. I know I’m reaching out less for answers and feeling less like the expert “teacher” I once was. Maybe I’m part of the reason those email lists are so silent.
Can’t help but think of how it must seem to a new homeschool mother to join one of those lists expecting encouragement, only to get three reminders for local attractions a week – and maybe a reminder email with ‘List Etiquette’, as if anyone really needs it any more. Or… is it just my homeschool email groups that aren’t talking?
:::crickets:::
Where are new homeschool parents getting information about homeschooling? Blogs? Conferences? Other homeschool friends? I’m pretty sure it isn’t on the email lists any more.
I know that the only constant in the world is change… and I see the homeschool movement changing. Some for the better, some for the worse. I see how my own homeschool philosophies and methods have changed so many times in these 11 or so years.
I’ve seen how we have needed to make changes and do what works after adding my little guys to our homeschool family. I’ve gone from needing guidance and hand-holding to “knowing what I was doing” to needing advice and a mentor again.
Can’t imagine what I would do without my online homeschool mom connections – and the IRL (in real life) moms I have met because of all those ‘ancient’ homeschool email lists that have hushed to a standstill.
I hope that you are finding the support you need out there somewhere, new homeschool friend.
{ In a world where there’s “an app for that”, there’s still nothing that can replace the friendship and advice of another homeschool mom. }
My husband were just talking about this topic recently. Excellent post.
Blessings
Honey
I think it’s bloggers, like you, with a whole wealth of valuable information that took away the need for list-serve help. Our group still helps each other, but it’s rarely about curriculum and schooling. Recently though, I was telling my DH about helping someone with that sort of question and he said “why didn’t you just tell them to Google it”. So, I guess because the info is at our fingertips we don’t have to go digging for it. I think it’s a good thing.
Amen.
You know, I haven’t consciously thought about it, but you’re right. We have more “communications tools” than ever, but there seems to be less communicating going on. Busy? Yes. Tools that only allow brief comments like Twitter and Facebook? Maybe. Taking in information, but not responding or interacting? Perhaps, like watching TV replaced live performances. Hmmm. I don’t think we truly realize all that we’re missing by not having the interaction, and especially, the in-person encouragement. We just feel that things are a bit emptier somehow, you think?
I’ve noticed the same trend, Heather. We began way back in ’92. Didn’t even have email lists back then. We forged ahead mostly on conviction and faith. Was it more difficult? Maybe, in a sense, but I believe we (meaning our family) were more focused on what we were about. The technology we have now is amazing! And the opportunities and choices are endless. For me, that makes it harder, ’cause this old mom gets worn out making decisions. Blessings to you and yours!
Ditto. In my area, there just seemed to be a lot of arguments kept cropping up, so if you knew what was good for you, you should just glean whatever information you could and keep your mouth shut. Eventually, most of the local Yahoo groups became mini clicks. Fortunately, I am still on a couple of yahoo groups that are more of the international sort. Somehow people who NEVER see each other tend to get along better.
ps. It seems most people are learning about homeschooling on YouTube lately. Kinda scary.
I have not experienced that. We have a great Yahoo group in our community! There are messages every day and they’re very encouraging. It’s a moderated group and so we rarely have had debates. I guess I’ll appreciate it just a little bit more now.
However, what I have noticed is a decline in the attendance of our IRL support group meeting. In that respect, people are just getting too busy.
I think that a lot of homeschoolers are now using social media to connect with each other. On facebook you can connect with friends, ask questions on pages, or join a group.
I think fb might be the new “email lists”. I actually don’t know what an email list is. I’ve liked lots of pages and there is tons of parental support. I think the best I’ve seen is The Old Schoolhouse Mahazine fb page. There are at least 15 questions a day from parents and no less than 10 answers for each from other parents, sometimes it’s more like 60! So it’s still out there, maybe just in a different form. Meetup.com is another good place to look.
Yes, Yahoo groups and forums (for the most part) are pretty obsolete. I think that the explosion of quality homeschool blogs has filled the gap for good information. As far as support — give and take — I’m not sure. Probably via social media, namely Facebook. The Internet is constantly changing, and how we interact changes too. I’ve got a yahoo group that I’m trying to decide how to handle — move to FB? Delete altogether? Not really sure.
I’m on quite a few of the Yahoo Groups and despite the fact that they are slow, I still consider them my number one way to find out about field trips and park days. I also know that if I do have a real need or question, SOMEONE out there will be willing to answer me. 🙂 It is just strange that they are becoming less active.
I will say this: I HATE FACEBOOK. I have a facebook group for the Homeschool Post authors and even though I’m admin for the site, I can’t ever get in there to check on it. I really don’t like it — and I miss a lot of convo b/c I can’t make myself get in there to keep up.
I’ve wondered the same thing. My first ‘support group’ was the homeschool forum on Crosswalk (which recently moved to Facebook). Then I discovered homeschool bloggers, and a local support group that provided some great face time with other families. We attend a church that has a significant number of homeschoolers. I don’t lack for places to go for info, or people to talk to about whatever is on my homeschoolin’ mind.
I also hope that those who need support are able to find it. I think we should just keep blogging and networking all we can in our own neck of the woods.